Why "Toxic masculinity" is a myth & Good for our society!

Published on 19 December 2019 at 01:04

Is being masculine bad for society? That's the question I'm going to answer for you today. Masculinity are a number of characteristics, behavior and roles that are associated with men. Which characteristics and behaviors are considered male differs per culture, but in the Western world, stoicism, resilience, strength, courage, independence and assertiveness are often seen as male.


I want to ask you not to judge about a man being ''too assertive'' and think that is aggressive or that a man is too stoic because he does not show his emotions too often. It is very important to know where this originates from before you judge it. Men are not masculine in their adult lives because others tell them that ''Crying is for girls'' or ''man up'', as many people think. Masculine traits originate from their biology, which is constructed over a period of 200,000 years! You can't just change that. No matter how you look at it, nature remains and people are part of it.


Survival of the fittest

In the past, when people were still living in nature, 'survival of the fittest' was always the case. Nature has therefore decided that each species has two sexes. The female gives birth to the children and is therefore evolved to have behavioral and physiological traits that are conductive to the healthy development and loving nurture of their young. These include tenderness, emotional awareness, empathy and patience.


In these times it was also important that women and children were protected, which is why nature has given men other traits to be able to do this. Think of more physical strength and courage to hunt and feed his family. The man evolved to have aggressiveness, resilience and assertiveness, which came in handy against rival males and enemy tribes and therefore protecting his family.


This division of roles was essentially pre-civilization, today it's more equally shared by parents. Is it true that since we have built a civilization the masculinity is no longer necessary? And that it only causes problems and bad things in our society, like many leftist activists claim? Certainly not!


''Toxic'' Masculinity

In this day and age, it is most socially accepted than ever in human history that a man can share his feelings, express emotion and for a man to have and marry another man as partner. These are positive events and it is great that this freedom is much more accepted. None of this degrades a man's masculinity, but neither are these traits where leftist activists are trying to suppress. They are more interested in the dominant, assertive and ''tough side'' of men which is biologically present in every man (to varying degrees).


Here we arrive at the well-known "Toxic masculinity" where the activists are against. But did you know that masculinity does more good than evil in our society? I dare to say this with certainty as a woman. In 2014, 73% of those arrested in the US were men, but we live in a society where the majority of good men are convicted and are publicly shamed to have masculinity traits, while a small percentage of men use their masculinity for crime. That's putting every man on the same page.


Masculinity in a positive light

The negative attention and the "Toxic Masculinity" that the activists create, takes away all attention from the good of masculinity. Don't forget that it originated from the need to care and protect their families! When a man brings his daughter to prom and wishes her a good evening, masculinity is doing good. When a firefighter rescues a child from a burning house, masculinity is doing good. When a man stops a thief who steals an older woman's handbag, it is masculinity doing good and I can continue for hours about the small and great good deeds that masculine man do every day. These are much larger numbers than the smaller groups who use their masculinity for terrible things.


In short: Trying to control the very much smaller amount of bad men by destroy and push down masculinity in all man... is scandalous and idiotic. Bad men don't get less bad if they are less masculine, but only get more frustrated, which in turn leads to more injustices. It's about time that we stood up for the good men in our society, don't let those activists let you feel down or ashamed for your masculinity!


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